dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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