oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
