Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
