For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
