Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
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