What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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