My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
