my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I forgot how hot balto sounded
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
