she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
