ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
