im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I will be naked everywhere
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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