The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
