she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
40s are totally the cure
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
