Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
He? As in you personified your dick?
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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