Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
we made out on top of his cat.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
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