after a month anything with tits is on the radar
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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