My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
