Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
