I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
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