i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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