My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Such a big mess for such a small penis
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
