Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
