TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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