idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
