I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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