so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize
