I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
