thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
