so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
