Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
