piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
