But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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