all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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