do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize
