New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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