If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I have aggressive nipples.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
