so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
