We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
