i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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