I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
