if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
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