I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
