I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
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