so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
