We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
