that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
