so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
