your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
