He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize