Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Less talking, more tequila
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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