what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
