I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Randomize
