I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize