Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
